Carnival of Souls
Reviewed by Nathan Johnston
Rating: 9 Beans
amn, its been so long since I've posted a review here that I don't know where to begin... oh yeah, this movie is... well... pathetic. I'm actually surprised that Wes Craven put his name to this debarcle. Yes you heard that right, Wes Craven maker of some of the scariest shite ever to come out of Hollywood was the Executive Producer of this pile of shite of another kind.
It wasn't even Craven's name that made me rent the damned thing. Allow me to side track you if you will... earlier this year they were playing re-runs of the first season of "Murder One" here in Oz and one of the actresses in the series (Bobbie Phillips) was rather yummy to say the least... excuse me for a few minutes - have to go take a cold shower. Anyways, being the IMDb nut/freak etc that I am, I went and checked out her credentials so to speak and found she was in a Wes Craven movie... a must rent obviously. Yeah and obviously I need to stop listening to the voices in my head.
The rest of the movie is right up there as well. Me thinks that there has not been a more boring horror/thriller movie ever made. It would also have to be the most incoherent, inconsistent, muddled, disjointed and ridiculous etc etc movie that I have ever seen. There are flashbacks within flashbacks within flashbacks. There are flashbacks within dream sequences and dream sequences within flashbacks plus dream sequences within dream sequences.
The time in the movie that I didnt spend wishing horrible mutations to its makers were mostly spent fruitlessly trying to decipher what the hell was happening. A close second would have been determining if what was happenning was a flashback, dream sequence... or God forbid... reality. I shouldn't even try to write about what actually happened in the movie... it is a logical and physical impossibility to describe it in any way (especially with my dicey grasp of the English language) but here goes...
It seems that there is a woman named Alex Grant (the Phillips chick) who, with her sister who run a bar (I'm not sure about this though... it could have been a dream sequence). Now Alex is really... shall we say ummm... mentally unstable from seeing her mum killed by an evil bastard clown. He was jailed many a year ago and has of course been released and he of course begins to terrorise Alex who proceeds to freak out through a series of flashbacks, dream sequences etc that are so disjointed and mind-numbing that they defy belief... and continuity.
That's it, I can't possibly describe this piece of "horror" (and I use the term in its very loosest meaning) any more than that. I would tell you to watch it yourself but I really don't fancy a mob of crazed, angry people trying to hunt me down and bring about my untimely and grisy demise.
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