Reviewed by Andy Bowers
Rating: 5 Beans
imagine the only reason Corey Haim is still doing movies (direct to video count I guess) is so he can retire at sixty five and say that he was in the film business for over 6 decades just like Mickey Rooney (who had to slum it on a "Silent Night, Deadly Night" sequel to achieve it).
Sure Corey might have to do "License to Drive 2" at age 30." Dream a Little Dream 3" at 40. Hmmm, and even "Prayer of the Rollerboys 2 at 50". The sad thing is that I can easily picture all that, especially if he can pry the coke away from his partner in crime Corey Feldman and unleash the unstoppable 80's juggernaut once again.
Hell, who's to say he doesn't rise like the mythological "Phoenix" from its ashes and is reborn into a solid Hollywood player again in the future?
Well, Demolition High might pose a slight de-railment on that Amtrak back from obscurity.
When his high school is taken over by mis-directed terrorists (high-school? Corey who the Hell do you think you are Ralph Macchio?) it's up to the Haim-anator to save the day, dispensing baddies with teenage vengeance (and a conveniently placed buzz-saw in shop-class) before they can launch a nuclear missile.
Oh Corey, have you fallen this far? Couldn't you have made Snowboard Academy 2 or Fast Get-away 3?
Starring in a film which Co-stars TV's "Growing Pains' - Alan Thicke? (all laughing aside, there's one scene in this film worth catching - where Thicke breaks out of his white-bread, anal retentive shtick and goes verbally abusive on a fellow officer. It would be like witnessing Angela Landsbury giving you the finger)
Plus it's got "Eight is Enough" dad - Dick VanPatten too!
I started to get bad 80's television casting flashbacks. Was it only a matter of time before I caught the guy who played "Schneider" on "One Day at a Time" as the janitor? Or the chick who played "Vera" on "Alice" as the lunch lady?.. sadly no. It was all about Corey and his battle to remain in whatever little limelight is left.
Do us a favor man, grab Feldman, Keifer Sutherland, Jami Gertz, Jason Patric and any other washed up alumni that can't get a job in Hollywood, get a backer and make Lost Boys 2.
80's Nostalgia is in.
Washed up 80's teen actors are not.
Not unless you've just robbed a bank. And frankly that might not be too far off.
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