Earth Girls Are Easy
Reviewed by John Milner
Rating: 8.5 Beans
h, there's nothing I like better than a really crappy flick from the 80s, and "Earth Girls Are Easy" just oozes crappiness, right from the opening sequence, which I would term a "Third Rock from the Sun" rip-off, had "Third Rock from the Sun" been around back then. Instead, we get introduced to Valerie (Geena Davis of "The Long Kiss Goodnight", one of the most unintenionally funny movies I've seen in years!). What a life Valerie leads, a manicurist who lives in the Valley and is engaged to her cheating doctor of a boyfriend, Ted (Charles Rocket of "Father's Day"). But when life gets Val down, she can always find comfort in a song and dance number, led by friend Candy (Julie Brown of "Clueless", which pretty much describes her character in this movie ) who...wait a minute, stop the horses, no one told me this was a musical. (As if this movie could get any worse!)
Anyways, a couple of musical numbers later, three aliens, named Wiploc (Jim Carrey of "The Truman Show), Zebo (Damon Wayons of "Bulletproof") and Mac (Jeff Goldblum of "Independence Day") crashland in Val's pool. Of course, after the initial shock of having a UFO in her pool (Does anyone actually swim in LA, or do they just have pools so they have something to sunbath beside?) wears off, Val enlists Candy to give them a makeover, and then just to keep a low profile, they decide to go out partying. The rest of the movie is about the three aliens getting into wierd situations while interacting with humans (mostly females). Oh yeah, and just to keep Davis and Goldblum happy, the two of them have a little romantic subplot thrown their way.
There are a couple of decent moments to the flick, mostly bit parts that are made into funny roles by the supporting cast, including Michael McKean ("This Is Spinal Tap") playing Woody, the stoned-out surfer dude/pool repairman, June C. Ellis (Corrina, Corrina) as an overly-nosy neighbour and casting Rick Hurst(who played Deputy Cletus on "The Dukes of Hazzard") as a LA cop.
You know, I think it may be more than a coincidence that Jeff Goldblum appeared as an alien in this movie and then was back in Independence Day. My theory: he went back to his planet, informed his superiors what he saw, and they decided to lay waste to Earth. I just wish they had arrived a little earlier, like about halfway through the third and final song, where Candy sings something about "Being a Blonde" in an utterly pointless scene. Come on Aliens, Imperial Stormtroopers, Klingons, anything.
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