Reviewed by Scott Murdock
Rating: 7.5 Beans
hat a gigantic waste of time. All this hype, all this excitement, all this anticipation, and what do we get? A freakin' iguana.
** SPOILERS ABOUND **
Though this movie has merit in that SOME of the special effects were FAIRLY good -- and because the concept of Godzilla as a mutated komodo dragon is slightly more believable than the concept of Godzilla as one of many giant creatures from Monster Island -- this movie otherwise just sucks.
First off, Godzilla should NOT be realistic-looking. The entire Godzilla genre requires a man in a rubber suit stomping on a Fisher Price play village. That is who Godzilla is. To create a technically sophisticated lizard movie and call it "Godzilla" is like making a competent version of "Plan 9 From Outer Space". It simply should not be done.
Godzilla is suppossed to have a personality and to be likeable. In movies where Godzilla "dies", we are suppossed to feel sad for him. Not in this case. He's just a boring run-of-the-mill lizard who likes to stomp on things and eat lots of fish. Who cares when he dies? It's just roadkill.
When Godzilla gave birth, I was excited because I expected to find an updated tribute to "Son of Godzilla" complete with a cute little lizard that blows smoke rings. Nope, all we get is a bunch of freaking velociraptors.
In fact, come to think of it, this movie is basically "The Lost World". You've got a Tyranasaurus Rex running loose through the streets of a city (Watch the iguana, it moves just like the "Jurassic Park" T-Rex) and a bunch of velociraptors chasing people through Madison Square Garden.
Speaking of the raptors, this was where the computer-generated special effects got their hokiest. Watch their feet as they run through the halls... they are quite obviously NOT standing on the floor.
Worst of all, no blue breath... and Godzilla's famous cry is not only muted down, it is also rarely heard.
I could mention that the movie stars people like Matthew Broderick and Hank Azaria, or that there is an amusing (when not annoying) parody of Siskel and Ebert, but who cares? The lizard is the star of the show, and this one just doesn't measure up. This movie should not be called "Godzilla". Let's retitle it "Attack of the Big Boring Komodo Dragon".
Other reviews for this movie:
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