Slime People, The
Reviewed by Jason Catanese
Rating: 9.5 Beans
he Slime People" may very well be the greatest movie ever made. So much happens in an unbelievable span of 76 minutes, it's amazing more people don't know about this.
It begins with a scene of the slime people reveling in the aftermath of a victory against the US Army. The director must of liked this scene, because it pops up a couple more times later on. Soon enough, our heroes are here to save the day. Tom, a newscaster, meets up with a scientist and his two daughters, who are in this film for no other reason than lack of female roles. After a few evasions from the slime, they meet up with a Marine who looks remarkably like Conan O' Brien.
There's no point to describe the plot to you, because it's basically man vs. slime. Man wins. That being said, check out these scenes: Two looters in a theater eaten by slime, an unbelievable writer named Toliver, who serves no purpose whatsoever except to make people like me laugh, and the ending brawl between the slime people and our heroes, who display some of the most uncoordinated moves these eyes have ever seen.
Because the slime people can only survive in a foggy atmosphere, you really can't see too much of this movie, which only adds to the greatness. And kudos to the cast for playing this with amazingly straight faces. Oh yeah, and don't watch it sober.
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