Dungeons & Dragons correction(s)
Reviewed by Roger M. Wilcox
Rating: 0 Beans
ou have no idea how difficult it is to get corrections in to a review you've submitted to _Bad Movie Night_. The "Contact Us" page results in a CGI error. Mail to email@example.com, firstname.lastname@example.org, or email@example.com bounces with an "unknown user" error. Mail to firstname.lastname@example.org doesn't bounce, but either Chris isn't reading this e-mail address any more or e-mail sent to this address goes off into an alternate dimension. Thus, the only way I could post corrections to my review of _Dungeons & Dragons_ was to post THIS message as a "review" of a non-existent movie called _Dungeons & Dragons correction(s)_. Here are my corrections to my earlier review:
FIRST, it it has been brought to my attention -- several times -- that Marlon Wayans is NOT the guy from the 7-up commercials. He only ACTS as goofy and annoying as the guy in the 7-up commercials due to the goofy and annoying script he was forced to work with in this movie. The onion apologizes for this error.
SECOND, many gamers have suggested that the spell Marina cast against Bruce Payne by throwing magic sand at him those two times was not "lightning bolt", but "magic missile". I hasten to remind these well-intentioned but obviously misguided gamers that "magic missile" has no material components. So there.
THIRD, at once place in my review, I accidentally called the villain "the CHAOTIC-evil Jeremy Irons", even though his imp familiar clearly establishes that he is either lawful-evil or neutral-evil. I consider this a typo. The keys for "lawful" and "chaotic" are RIGHT next to each other on my keyboard. Yeah, that's it, that's the ticket. There were several other typos, of course, such as accidentally calling it the "Rod of Sevrille" instead of the Rod of SAVrille (with an "a").
FOURTH -- and this is truly frightening -- Wizards of the Coast has posted character sheets and adventure settings for the main characters in the movie, at http://www.wizards.com/dnd/article.asp?x=movie/mx20001208c . However, they don't use the rules from 2nd Edition AD&D, which is what the movie's producer/director was (allegedly) using. The Wizards of the Coast guys instead use the rules from the "Dungeons and Dragons Adventure Game", which is a cut-down subset of the 3rd Edition D&D rules. They have Ridley as a 2nd level thief/1st level fighter (using those so-called "multi-class" character rules from 3rd Edition, which are a half way bastardization of the old AD&D multi-class and dual-class rules), and the female elven ranger as a female elven FIGHTER because the D&D Adventure Game doesn't have rangers in it. They also claim that Marina's lasso-the-theives spell is actually cast from a magic item, thereby cheating their way out of having to pick a "real" D&D spell that this movie special-effect corresponds with.
You may now resume your debate over whether a fireball, cast from an artifact or demigod, will affect anything inside an anti-magic shell.
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