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The 100

Frank McKlusky C.I.
Reviewed by Patrick Brogan
Rating: 9.5 Beans

don't mind goofy comedies, when there are parts that are funny. Peter Sellers for me is the king of modern slapstick comedy, watch his PINK PANTHER films, or better yet watch THE PARTY which shows Sellers at his best. Then Charles Chaplin and Buster Keaton were the rulers of the slient era. Today, people consider Jim Carrey as the king of the "slapstick" comedy. I don't care much for ACE VENTURA, but his following films proved Carrey to show that unique talent. But for my money, I think Johnny Depp is the modern king of slapstick comedy, sadly, Depp is barely given the chance to do comedy.
However, there are so many people and comedians that try to take the title of being funny while doing foolish and silly things. Most fail, yet actor Dave Sheridan not only failed, he crashed and burned. With his film FRANK McKLUSKY C.I. this is a film that has so many jokes (or attempt at jokes) and it's a miracle, not a single one is funny! For it's 80 minute running time, I couldn't find a single joke that had any laugh, not even a weak chuckle.
The plot has young Frank witnesses his stunt-devil father (played by Randy Quaid) in an accident who is in a coma. Since this film is suppose to be a comedy, the coma consist of Quaid sitting on a wheelchair or in bed with a shocked look on his face. Frank (Dave Sheridan) grows up to become an investigator for claims for a insurance company. Yet because of the accident, Frank still lives with both his coma-state father, and mother (Dolly Parton). And Frank also wears several protective gear like a bike helmet, knee pads, chest protector, and has several protctive devices to keep him safe, such as saftey belts across his bed. Here's another attempt at a joke, Frank also has his dog buckled in and also wearing a helmet, ho-ho. It turns out that Frank's partner and buddy, Jimmy (Kevin Farley, the brother of Chris Farley), is murdered and Frank wants to know why.
This is a film where the jokes consist of either a character named Scout Bayou (to sound but spelled different than HAPPY DAYS actor Scott Baio), or Frank trying out different outfits in disguise. It appears that actor and writer Dave Sheridan (along with writer Mark Perez) took scenes from other comedies and put them in this movie. Sadly, the jokes taken from the other movies weren't funny from the original films. An example is when Frank dresses up as a jockey (the same joke was in John Candy's WHO'S HARRY CRUMB). The joke wasn't funny in HARRY CRUMB and it's annyoing in this film.
What surprises me is the supporting talent in this film, why are they in a movie like this? Talented people like Dolly Parton (9 TO 5, BEST LITTLE WHOREHOUSE IN TEXAS, STRAIGHT TALK), Randy Quaid (VACATION, KINGPIN, QUICK CHANGE), Orson Bean (BEING JOHN MALKOVICH, INNERSPACE), Kevin Pollak (USUAL SUSPECTS, CASINO, GRUMPY OLD MEN), Tracy Morgan (Saturday Night Live, Crank Yankers), Andy Richter (Conan O' Brien, BIG TROUBLE, Andy Richter Controls the Universe), Adam Carolla (Crank Yankers, Man Show, Loveline), George Lopez (George Lopez Show), R. Lee Ermey (FULL METAL JACKET, SE7EN, SALTON SEA), Joanie Laurer ("Chyna" from WWF), and Patrick Cranshaw ("Blue" from OLD SCHOOL) are talented people, which is why I put other good works in comedy that they have done after their names.
Why are these talented people in this bad movie? My guess is either: A.) they thought Dave Sheridan was Jim Carrey, since he looks a little like him, and the actors thought they were in a sure-fire box office hit or B.) Dave Sheridan is a really nice guy.
I can't critize Dave Sheridan, he stole every scene in GHOST WORLD as Doug, the mullet guy who blasted his "freedom of speech" rock n' roll out side the Greek owner convience store. I thought his role and performance was the best thing in GHOST WORLD. I can't blame director Arlene Sandford who had directed episodes of good t.v. shows like Malcolm In the Middle, Ed, West Wing, and even directed the better than the original A VERY BRADY SEQUEL. No, I'll blame co-writer Mark Perez, why? Because his other writing credit was DISNEY'S THE COUNTRY BEARS, which was a horrible family film, just like this is a horrible comedy.
If there is anything I can't stand is unfunny comedies. But this film manages to keep churning out unfunny jokes throughout the entire film. Plus the film even keeps spewing out the same unfunny joke that it becomes tedious. One joke that keeps being brought up is the Jimmy character was gay. Frank is horrified to hear about this, so the film keeps making refrences to Jimmy's homosexuality. I'm a hetrosexual, however I was offended at the continious homosexual jokes in this film, "he is so gay" is the punchline that keeps coming up in this film. The other offensive joke is people in wheelchairs by having them fall down and get hurt. This is very cruel and most of all NOT funny, yet the makers of this movie seem to find it funny. It appears that Sheridan and Perez are going for the Farrelly brothers style of comedy where things that are normally offensive in reality, are funny on the screen. What the Farrelly brothers do that Sheridan and Perez fail to do is to show a symphetic side to the disabled people in their films. In SHALLOW HAL, the viewer has a better understanding and feelings for obese people, while in FRANK McKLUSKY C.I. there is not sympethic scenes for the viewer to show that gay people and handicapped people also have feelings. No, this film's jokes are more like the playground bully who knocks the kid off the wheelchair and laughs as the poor kid is lying helpless on the ground.
Then there are the celebrity cameos that try to impress the audience that they can get celebrities in their film. Too bad the celebrity cameos consist of has beens like Scott Baio, Gary Owens, Emmamuel Lewis, Lou Ferrigno, that ventriloquist who use to host ABC's Saturday Morning Special with his puppet Issac, and the lowest of them all, Hanson. Yes, the same teenage pop group who wooed 12 year olds five years ago, are now considered with the New Kids on the Block for the '90's. This film uses the rough looking character of Scout Bayou who is in a wheelchair and drives a monster truck, attend a concert of Hanson because he's a Hanson fan. If this is a joke, it's not funny. I think it's more funny if director Sandsford couldn't afford or get a more talented rock group to be in this movie, and had to resort to getting Hanson, that right there is a more funnier joke. Then we get to see Frank put on several different costumes (a la Inspector Jacques Clouseau) and bumbling things up. Where Clouseau was a bumbling idiot who kept messing thigs up with disastourous results, Frank just winds up getting beaten up and realizes he did wrong. That is a failing element when it comes to bumbling characters, Clouseau succeeds because he doesn't know at times he is doing something wrong, that is the element of the comedy. With this film, the viewer is suppose to laugh because we are watching this man getting hurt. Then another poor attempt for a joke is when Frank puts on a Mr. T outfit, and it looks like Dave Sheridan dressed like Mr. T. If they really wanted to make this film funny, why not get the real Mr. T instead, then when Frank takes off the costume, he looks like his normal self. Instead of making the costume look really good and even funny by bringing in the real Mr. T, it instead looks like a high school production of the A-Team.
I watched this film with my mom who enjoys silly and wacky comedies even more than I do. When this film was over, even she said, "that was a bad movie" and my mom hasn't said that about a film since KAZAMM. My mom loves any comedy, even the bad ones, that I don't like: WEDDING PLANNER, BLACK SHEEP, MISS CONGENALITY the list goes on. For her to say, "this movie is bad" goes to show that this film fails to amuse the slapstick and the witty. I would put this film along with KUNG POW, CORKY ROMANO, and SLACKERS, a film that tries so many jokes, yet every joke is awful. However, even KUNG POW, CORKY, and SLACKERS had one or two funny jokes in those films, FRANK McKLUSKY has none. Can this be the worst comedy of all time? Pretty much. So why didn't I give this 9.5 beans instead of 10 beans? Well, seeing all of the talent involved as the supporting characters of this film, it's a good cast of actors; but if the usually wacky and goofy Randy Quaid is just sitting on the bed making a funny face and keeping it for most of the movie is what you see in this film, then you know you're in trouble.
This is the kind of film to show in film schools on how a comedy can fail. By using unfunny gags from previous films and placing them together into one film. This film does that, which is why I call this film a miracle, since I have never seen a comedy where I haven't laughed once. And FRANK McKLUSKY C.I. accomplished that feat.

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